How did it all start?

I, Melissa, started out in the freelance world as a copywriter. And I suffered with eczema.  

Endlessly searching for cure, I tried pretty much everything from restrictive diets, homeopathy, Chinese medicine. The works.  Then one day (back in 2005) a friend suggested I try neuro linguistic programming.

I was both curious and alarmed.  

Could my brain really be “re-programmed”?  It sounded a bit sci-fi. With nothing to lose, I investigated, and quickly enrolled in John Seymour’s Practitioner and then the Masters Practitioner programme.

My key insight (there were many but this was the most powerful) was that WE are in charge of our thoughts, they’re not in charge of us.

This had a dramatic effect on my eczema.  

It was so powerful that I wanted to help other people with similar issues – namely how their thinking was also getting in their way.  So I decided to train as a coach with Coaching Development and then, prior to the recession, set up a business called Coaching Creatives in 2007.

With a limited marketing budget, I realised that I needed to go out and network to raise my profile, build relationships and spot opportunities.  Trouble was, I HATED it.

I loathed going into rooms of people I’d never met, didn’t know how to talk about coaching without boring people and found it tough to develop new business. After all people buy outcomes not processes.

Nevertheless, I recognised lots of other people also found networking challenging.  And I also realising the importance of being able to articulate what you do in a way that’s interesting and memorable.  After, all we are constantly being asked, “What do you do?” and how we answer this question has a direct impact on how successful we are when developing new business relationships.

Having spent about six months attending a whole range of events, I was fed up of returning home from disastrous events with fistfuls of business cards and not remembering who I’d met or why I might need them.

What was the point? But I knew I couldn’t just stop networking so I decided to change the way I thought about it. Voraciously reading lots of books, attending skills courses and joining lots of business networking groups, I scrambled up the steep learning curve.

I started studying those who I remembered to find out what they were doing differently from those that I’d easily forgotten. And as a result developed 7 principles which we can apply to our conversations to help make us more memorable.  

This work caught the attention of the finance, high tech and creative industry. I travelled up and down the country sharing my findings – with HSBC, the Chartered Insurance Institute and a host of advertising agencies.

I then realised I should specialise in the finance sector as I was increasingly being asked to run sessions for the insurance and personal finance society. And so I re branded and my business became Motem.

Motem comes from the the latin word motus – which means to motivate and move.

I’ve always been interested in language that creates changes in behaviour.

And to move, we need to feel.

Increasingly, much of my work is helping professionals speak to THEMSELVES in kinder ways.

Typically high achieving professionals are driven by a loud inner critic that they believe helps them to be the best version of themselves and to do their best work.

However research that this approach doesn’t work over the long term. So I’ve developed a range of sessions and programmes to help enhance confidence and reduce anxiety. Some people have found them to be life changing.

An experienced soft skills course provider

Improving the way we communicate can improve the quality of our lives – both at work and home. Our ability to connect with others, build trust, manage conflict, and communicate effectively is more important than ever. Job insecurity is rife, AI is on the rise and trust is low.

Get in touch

Interested? Drop me a line and we can arrange a time to talk.